===
1123,
1
===

 

{1123,1}

kal le gaʾe the yār hameñ bhī chaman ke bīch
us kī sī bū nah āʾī gul-o-yāsman ke bīch

1) yesterday friends took even/also us into the midst of the garden
2) no scent/trace like hers came amidst the rose and jasmine

 

Notes:

: 'Odour, scent, smell; trace, soupçon, small portion, particle'. (Platts p.173)

S. R. Faruqi:

In this 'ground' Sauda too has composed a competitive [maʿrakah-ārā] ghazal. Mir's opening-verse is by way of introduction.

This theme he has composed much better in

{31,1}.

And better than both of them, in the fourth divan, is

{1373,5}.

Sauda's opening-verse itself is very fine; but among the rest of his verses, despite their fineness none of them have approached the quality of the three verses (after the opening-verse) that are in our intikhab.

FWP:

SETS
MOTIFS
NAMES
TERMS == INTIKHAB

A 'competitive' ghazal is one that was composed in the same meter and rhyme scheme [t̤araḥ] as some other ghazal, to challenge comparison; probably the occasion was a mushairah. Just for interest, here's Sauda's opening-verse to which SRF refers (from kulliyāt-e saudā jild-e avval , ed. M. S. Siddiqi, Lahore: Majlis Taraqqi-e Adab, 1973, pp. 156-57):

saudā giriftah-dil ko nah lāʾo suḳhan ke bīch
jūñ ġhunchah so zabān hai us ke dahan ke bīch

[don't bring melancholy Sauda amidst the speech/poetry
like a bud, is how the tongue is within his mouth]

There's also a note in that edition pointing out that Mir had chosen to include a verse from this ghazal of Sauda's in his own intikhab, nikāt ul-shuʿarā , so that its composition can be dated to before 1751.

The verse that Mir chose to include was the fifth of Sauda's eight verses (p. 156):

kal ruḳhṣat-e bahār thī shabnam ṣifat maiñ zor
royā har ek gul ke gale lag chaman ke bīch

[yesterday it was the leave-taking of the spring; like the dew, I bitterly
wept, taking every single rose in an embrace, amidst the garden]

Note for meter fans: We have to treat yāsmin as yāsman , for the sake of the rhyme.

 

 
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