Ghazal 307x, Verse 1

Asi:

In a state of wildness, my waiting has made me a wanderer of the desert of thought; and now my wildness and wandering is in such a state that the eye of a gazelle-- which itself is of a wild temperament-- from afar seems to me to be a whiteness. That is, even from it I am very far, and my state of wildness is separate from its state of madness.

== Asi, p. 151

Zamin:

inti:zaar-aavaarah = a wanderer of waiting. safedii maartii hai = shows a small glimpse of whiteness.

That is, in waiting for some unavailable beloved, I wander stumblingly around like a madman in the desert of thought, the way a hunter, having seen from afar the whiteness of a gazelle's eye, would pursue it.

== Zamin, p. 217

Gyan Chand:

inti:zaar-aavaarah = one who, in waiting, wanders here and there. In waiting for the beautiful ones, a wildness has overcome me, and I wander around, deep in thought. The eye of a deer is called 'wild'; I have gone out so far into the desert of thought that the wild deer have remained far behind me. Their eye, from afar, seems to be a single white spot.

== Gyan Chand, p. 244

FWP:

SETS
DESERT: {3,1}
GRANDIOSITY: {5,3}

For more on Ghalib's unpublished verses, see the discussion in {4,8x}. See also the overview index.

The speaker claims to be so fa r gone in 'wildness', so far out in the 'desert of thought', that he's way beyond even h proverbially 'wild' and shy gazelle. The quality of va;hshat is excellently protean. The gazelle shows 'timidity, dread, fright'; as Mehr Farooqi notes, 'The conceit is that whites of the eyes become prominent when one rolls the eyes, a sign of distress or vahshat'. But what kind of va;hshat does the speaker show? We have our choice of any or all of the various possibilities in the definition above.

This verse recalls the even more grandiose {5,3}, in which the speaker is so far into the 'beyond' that he's passed out of nonexistence itself-- luckily for the Anqa, whose wings were vulnerable to his fiery sighs. In the present, more moderate verse, the speaker is off in his 'desert of thought', and is far beyond only the gazelle. But deer are traditionally supposed to live freely in the vicinity of the Ka'bah, where it is forbidden to hunt them. Are we meant to think of this association? It's really hard to say.

Note for grammar fans: The noun compound 'waiting-wanderer', inti:zaar-aavaarah , would seem to be a 'reversed i.zaafat '. For more on these, see {129,6x}.