z-bas dosh-e ram-e aahuu pah hai ma;hmil tamannaa kaa
junuun-e qais se bhii sho;xii-e lail;aa numaayaa;N hai
1) {although / to such an extent} the palanquin/'camel-litter' of longing is on the shoulder of the panic of a deer
2) even/also through the madness of Qais, the mischievousness of Laila is apparent/manifest
By 'longing' is meant Qais's longing. There is a proverbial saying baraat-e ((aashiqaa;N bar shaa;x-e aahuu . From this he took the idea that the camel-litter of Qais's longings has been bound on to the back of the panic of a deer. That is, the longing he has for union with Laila is mad [majnuunaanah], and from this the mischievousness of Laila can be seen.
Majnun was fond of the eyes of deer, because in them was the mischievousness of Laila's eyes. In any case deer are found in the wilderness/jungle, and their presence gestures toward the madness of Qais. The camel-litter of longing is on the shoulder of the panic (swift running) of a deer-- that is, the longing doesn't come to hand, it is running away. Laila too doesn't come to hand. For the longing to be together with the panic of a deer is Laila's mischievousness, because there is an affinity between Laila and the eye of a gazelle.
SETS == BASKIH; DISRUPTION
MADNESS: {14,3}
For more on Ghalib's unpublished verses, see the discussion in {4,8x}. See also the overview index.
The first line offers a fine example of Ghalib's joy in disrupting his own metaphors. Any good poet would have given us a palanquin or ma;hmil -- on the flexibility of the term see {147,7x}-- of longing, that was borne on the shoulder of a deer. This would have been original, and would have worked well with Majnun's living in the wilderness, cared for by the wild animals. Only Ghalib would give us a palanquin that was borne 'on the shoulder of the panic of a deer'. Deer have shoulders, but does 'panic' have a shoulder? We might well be able to visualize a palanquin borne on the shoulders of deer; but the insertion of the 'panic' renders the whole thing un-visualizable, and thus entirely abstract.
Compare the ' ma;hmil of the glance' that is borne 'on the shoulder of a spark' in {76,4x}; in that case, the whole image is abstract from the beginning, so the effect is not disruptive.
It's also left up to us to decide about the connection between the two semantically independent lines. Is the 'madness' of Qais the same as the 'longing'? Or is his madness shown by the impossible palanquin in which the 'longing' rides? Or is his madness connected to the 'panic' felt by a deer? And what role does Laila's 'mischievousness' play in all this? The verse is so radically abstract that we really have almost no basis for deciding. The commentators differ so widely that they might almost have been reading three different verses.
Asi:
Since the camel-litter of longing-- that is, the resting-place of longing-- is on the shoulder of the panic of a deer-- that is, in a state of panic-- in this connection the expression of the mischievousness of Laila is also through the madness of Qais. Laila feels panic in her own right, and Majnun's longing is on the shoulder of panic. In this way there is oneness between them both.
== Asi, p. 232